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Обновление на сайте «Tickling in Russia»

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Заповедник, водопад, речка, единение с природой и полная идиллия -  о чем еще может мечтать будущая певица? Ну, конечно же, о благодарных слушателях! Но главная героиня этого рассказа даже и не могла предположить, кто окажется этим слушателем и чем он отблагодарит неосмотрительную певунью! Новый перевод в  библиотеке на сайте «Tickling in Russia», озаглавленный неизвестным переводчиком "Елки-палки" , расскажет вам также и о тех опасностях, которые могут подстерегать щекотливых девушек во время рыбной ловли. Весьма поучительная история!

ЗЫ-ЗУ. WANTED!!!!! Тех, кто знает что-либо определенное о переводчике сего рассказа или хотя бы сможет указать точный адрес оригинального английского текста, ждет пожизненная благодарность от администрации сайта «Tickling in Russia».

Отредактировано ОбновлялкО (2007-10-19 21:46:37)

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Перевод хорош. :)))) Что же до сюжета - не советую делать это без специальной подготовки ;)))))) ибо язык у медведя жестче, чем собачий или кошачий, и может содрать кожу. :(((

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What WOOD You Do?

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From: ladylavon@aol.com (LadyLaVon)
Newsgroups: alt.binaries.multimedia.erotica.tickling
Subject: NEW STORY!!! "What WOOD You Do?" ?>F
Date: 30 Mar 1997 23:51:39 GMT
Organization: AOL http://www.aol.com
Lines: 145
Message-ID: <19970330235100.SAA22969@ladder01.news.aol.com>
NNTP-Posting-Host: ladder01.news.aol.com
X-Admin: news@aol.com

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"What Wood You Do?"
By Mistress LaVon
Judging by their clothes, you would have guessed that Kay and Sandy were going two different places for their Spring Break, when in fact the were both going to Jellystone National Park to get away from the city for a while. Kay was dressed for survival from head to toe. On her head sat a Smoky the Bear hat complete with Misqutoe netting. Her hair was rolled up perfectly under the hat. (to prevent head lice). She wore a long sleeve denium shirt with a collar that covered most of her neck. She explained to Sandy that denium was a very tough material and most insects could not penetrate it. Heavy jeans encased her thighs. Three socks covered each foot and were stuffed deeply inside of heavy mountain boots. kay made sure she was so protected against the eliments of nature that she may as well have stayed home.

Sandy on the other hand was a nature lover. She let down her long hair with nothing to hold it in place for the first time since the start of school. Her breast swayed freely inside her Nike tank top with no bra to cage them in. And her buns jiggled rhythmaticlly in her bright pink Daisy Dukes as she walked amoung the trees. I very thin soled sandle was all that seperated her tiny feet from the forest floor. And though there was nothing more she would rather do than to walk around bare foot, even she was aware of the jagged rocks and sticks that could cut her.

The girl set up their tents in a very open area near the water fall. They were both well aware of their location in the forest; Sandy by the trees and stars at night, Kay by several maps and a compass.

"Well I've made a medium sized circle with rocks making sure they lean towards the inside of the circle, gathered several buckets of water and placed them near the circle, gathered old wood that had falled off trees already, and sterilized the one pan you allowed me to bring with us. I think we are ready to cook dinner." said Kay proudly as she glanced down at her handy work. After a moment of holding it in Sandy released a hardy laugh.

"God, you are so anal! Loosen up! This IS Spring Break, remember? We are supposed to be having fun." Sandy said through her giggles.

"Well it wouldn't be much fun for the forest dwellers if we were to burn it down. Now why don't you get off your lazy ass and catch us a fish for dinner!" said Kay as she playfully threw the fishing pole at Sandy.

Sandy stood up and dusted off her behind. She kicked off her sandles, threw her fishing pole over her shoulder, and started whistling the theme to the "Andy Griffith Show" as she made her way down to the stream.

There was a big flat rock next to the stream, perfect for sitting and fishing. Sandy figured that someone had placed it there since it was in such a perfect position. And very comfortable she noted as she sat down and put her feet in the water, preparing to cast.

Sandy didn't know much about fishing, which didn't bother her at all. She was enjoying the sound of the rushing water and nature's music floating on the wind. Free to vegetate and daydream, Sandy entertained thoughts of being a famous singer. She always thought she had a nice voice but never recieved much support from her family and freinds. Kay wouldn't even give her a straight answer when Sandy would ask her how she sounded. But here, now, Sandy was performing in front of an audience of 100,000 plus. Screaming for just one more song. Sandy closed her eyes and smiled.

She was snapped out of her daydream by something bumping her foot. Sandy opened her eyes and looked at the water around her ankles. She was surprised to she several fish had gathered around her feet, occasionally nibbling at them.

"Hey you sillies! You're supposed to be eating the worm, not me!" she said to the fish. Thinking the fish could do no harm, Sandy lay back down on the flat rock with her eyes closed and continued to her daydream. She smiled every so often as she felt a fish nibbling at her toes.

"Hey!" Kay snapped.

Sandy jumped as she open her eyes. She could tell by the direction of the sun that it was evening. She had fallen asleep.

"I send you down here to catch lunch and what do you get?" barked Kay

"A good tan?" said Sandy stretching. She pulled her water wrinkled feet onto the rock so they could dry.

"Do you think you can stay awake long enough to catch DINNER now?" barked Kay again.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just what have you been doing this whole time?" asked Sandy.

"Well sleeping beauty, since you asked. I have been searching for signs of wild animals. I want OUR sleep to be as peaceful as possible. And make sure that we don't become prey is a good start. Now will you please catch something to eat?!!!" Kay turned and stormed off.

Sandy rubbed her still soggy feet as the feeling began to return to them. She relaoded a worm onto her hook and cast towards the bottom of the water fall. It wasn't two minutes since Kay left that Sandy her footsteps coming down the trail again. Sandy began to get angry.

"Listen Srgt. Carter, I can't catch a fish that fast!! What do you think I am, a bear?" yelled Sandy as she snapped around ready to engage Kay in a verbal if not physical battle. But Sandy's anger turn to fear as she saw what she thought was Kay to be a mother bear and her cub.

Sandy sat nervously looking at them both as they slowly made their way towards her. The mother bear walked off to Sandies right towards the deeper part of the stream. Sandy then realized that this was just a fishing lesson and she had nothing to fear. But the cub did not follow the mother bear. Instead, it went right to Sandy, nudging its head into her chest.

"Well hi there fella!" she said as she stroked the cubs head. The mother watched this for a minute, and once convinced that Sandy meant the cub no harm, went back to her fishing.

The cub allowed Sandy to scratch its head for a while. Soon it began to explore the different scents of Sandy's body. Sandy, still being cautious of the mother bear, allowed him to do so.

The cub seemed to become excited when he go to Sandies feet. For a second, she though he would try to bite one of them. Instead, it stroked its long tongue up the sole of her left foot causing a bolt of ticklish electricity to shoot through Sandy's body. She managed to keep her laughter down to a giggle so she wouldn't upset the mother bear. But she knew that she would not be able to stand much of this at all without screaming. Sandy wondered why the cub would be so drawn to her feet. Then she remembered the fish. The scent must be on them.

With the second lick, Sandy threw her head back and laughed liked a 1st grader being tickled by his favorite teacher. She couldn't stand it. She try pushing the cub away say "No no no! Don't lick my feet!" giggling the whole time. The mother bear let out a roar of disapproval causing Sandy to take her hands of the cub. The cub continued it's licking.

Sandy laughed herself hoarse. She began to feel dizzy as oxygen continued to be forced out of her lungs by the laughter. The bears quick licks were driving her insane. And for a second, she thought of her mother's feet sticking through the ceiling of her bedroom, covered with BBQ souce and their dog lapping away at them.

At the point Sandy thought she would go crazy she snatched her legs underneath her, getting her feet out of the cubs reach. The cub became frustrated and begane pawing at Sandy's legs trying to reach her feet. Even at such a young age, the cub was very strong and she knew that if he kept this up, he could reallt hurt her. She also realized that if momma bear noticed his frustration, she might decide to come "help" him. So, with no other option available, Sandy stuck her legs back out in front of her, leaving her barefeet to the mercy of the hungry cub.

Sandy's laughter was like music floating through the forest. So much so that it brought Kay back to their camp site. Kay looked over to where Sandy was and shook her head. Sandy's laughter was fuel to Kay already burning fire.

"Great! Just Great! Now you're playing with bears! You know what? I've had it with you and this stupid vacation. You want to stay here with nature, fine! I'm going home." Kay stomped off towards town. Sandy was laughing so hard that not even the word "wait" would come out.

The cub stopped when Sandy was on the verge of passing out. She lay there on the flat rock soaked with sweat and tears. The mother bear had gotten the cub's attention by bringing a fish to him. So she thought. Sandy tried to stand but the mother bear let out another roar of disapproval. Confused, Sandy lay back on the rock.

The mother bear began eating the fish as she gave her cub a nudge. It seemed to Sandy that she was pushing the vub back in her direction. Then Sandy realized what was happening. The mother bear brought HER dinner closer to the cub to make sure Sandy stayed where she was until the cub finished his! And with that terrorfying realization, the cub began licking again.

The End

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Спасибо, Икис!!!! Я в свое время долго искала исходный текст. Но - мне видать не судьба была. :))

Могу лишь добавить, что первоначально данный перевод был выложен а сайте Pit'а (старики вспомнят). Там кстати тоже не было никаких ссылок ни на автора, ни на переводчика, ни на исходик :((((

Икис, а автора перевода не знаешь случайно?

Роберт, а откуда такая информация по поводу жесткости медвежьих языков? :)))))

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ибо язык у медведя жестче, чем собачий или кошачий, и может содрать кожу. :(((

Н-да? Уверен?
Медведь относится к собачьим, а у них язык мягкий. Ну, насколько я знаю. Вот если бы тигр - то да...

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Страна должна знать своих героев!!!!!! Скромный автор признался в содеянном и сейчас понесет все бремя народной (ну или хотя бы моей) благодарности. Итак! Автор сего перевода - Икис. :)))) А говорил - не пишешь, не переводишь. И чего скромничаешь? :)))))

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Икис, прости за тупой вопрос. Где там ссылка именно на этот расказ? Ну не могу я его найти :(((((((

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Где там ссылка именно на этот расказ?

"Там" - это где?

В переводе ссылки на оригинал нет.
Сам рассказ болтался одно время на всяких ресурсах, и откуда был взят сейчас уже и не упомню.
Найти его можно хотя бы тут:
http://www.tickletheater.com/archive/in … 10877.html

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Вот это я имела в виду. Спасибо, Икис!! Без тебя бы точно не нашла  (хотя ведь ооооочень долго искала). Тем более ты так мастерски перевел название рассказа, что восстановить первоначальное мне бы за всю жизнь фантазии не хватило. :))

Кстати, так, на будущее. Дорогие авторы, ежели я прошу ссылку на первоисточник, вы уж присылайте точную ссылку именно на этот рассказ, а не на всю библиотеку буржуйского сайта. Напоминаю в очередной раз: я - баба-дура, подумывающая о том, чтобы перекраситься в блондинку. Уверена, вопросов нет :)))))

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